Friday, February 22, 2008

24 Things (Vol. 4)

13. When I worked at Country Insurance in high school, I learned about the full-moon phenomenon. When there was a full moon, we would get the craziest claims reported. Claims like one hay bale sliding out from the middle of the stack and landing on a car, or multiple rats getting pulled up inside a swather and resulting in motor damage. This last year I learned the full-moon phenomenon is magnified in the hospital. Suddenly I feel like I’m working in a psych ward rather than a cardiac unit. However, the most notable full-moon phenomenon I’ve ever encountered happened last August when I drove down to Tri Cities the morning after a full moon. I counted 32 roadkills. Now a few of those roadkills were just sparrows, but the highlight of the show was a cow. I can only imagine what it was like driving on the road that night. I’m imagining mass hysteria on the animals' part, and mass horror as drivers thudded over each bulls-eye. Thing learned, on Highway 17 full moon equals mass slaughter.

14. Sometimes when you delay gratification too long, it only results in disappointment. The summer after 8th grade I made a time capsule at girls' camp. The time capsule was a one gallon tin can used for dry-pack canning. In my capsule, I carefully selected the items I wanted to rediscover in 10 years. After I sealed it up, I quickly forgot what I’d put in it. My only clues were my best friend's and my crush’s name written on the outside lid and that when I shook the can… it rattled. 2007 seamed like such a long ways away. I almost opened it in 2001 and again in 2005. The only restraint that kept me from taking the can opener to it was the HOPE that whatever I’d put in there would be good enough to make the wait worth while. D-I-S-A-P-P-O-I-N-T-M-E-N-T! As these pictures show, there was nothing but CRAP in that can. Of all the lame things I stuffed into that can, here are the top four:
  • A Lego Man: He had only one hand and his head was blue without a face on it. Why did Lego even make blue heads without faces?
  • A Pass the Pigs Pig: That explains why I haven’t played Pass the Pigs for the past 10 years… no pig.
  • A 101 Dalmatian Valentine: It was a Valentine from 4th grade and all it said was “To: Cali” and “From: Stephanie.” At this point I started wondering if I accidentally mixed up my time capsule and trash piles.
  • A Domino: I’m blank on this one. I have NO idea why I put a single domino in my time capsule. It doesn’t even have my lucky numbers on it.
Thing learned, time capsules are never a good idea unless you’re putting money and photographs in them.

15. I can only go so far in conquering a fear. I may be holding him, but take note, my hand is over my heart and if it wasn’t… my heart would have already busted free. Also, that snake doesn’t know it yet, but there is NO WAY I’m going to quit pinching his head. He is coiling his body around my arm making that long straight part of his body as tight as a guitar string. I’m assuming he thinks this will make me release his head. Uhhhh, NO! It won’t. I don’t care if he pulls his body so tight he pops his own head off. I AM NOT LETTING GO! Thing learned, fear only makes me pinch harder.

16. Mandy-Rae Cruickshank, the freediving world champion, can freedive (no oxygen tank or weights) 289 feet and hold her breath 6 minutes and 25 seconds. She states that she only has to kick to 132 feet, where a person becomes negatively buoyant, and she just falls the rest of the way. She also states that she has learned to do exercises that help her combat the impulse to breath. Thing learned, suddenly I’m not so proud of my 100 meter swim (with no breaths) during swim team practice.


Neighbor Jane Payne said...

Oh gee, your entry with the snake made me laugh. At least you touched HELD him.

Being one that has a hard time delaying gratification, I'm glad to hear every once in a while I'm not missing out on something!

I love your blog.

mdr said...

I can totally relate to the snake fear but you have made it much farther than I. My son's school has a pet snake and everyone knows to alert me upon entrance if it is out of its cage as I wiull leave till it returns to the cage! :)

Susan said...

Cali! I love your blog! It makes me laugh right out loud, which I think is the sincerest form of compliment. Fun, fun, fun!

melanie said...

I'm pretty sure this is my favorite installment so far. It's great! Especially the time capsule. I did the same thing. We had done them in YW and we were supposed to say what our lives would be like 5 years after graduation (10 yrs after making the capsule). So that would have made me 23. I listed all sorts things...married, 2 kids, house, blah, blah. I was not even ONE thing on the list except alive! At first I thought it could be depressing but it became hilarious that I would think I would have all that at a mere 23. Definitely written by a 13 yr old.

I swear I'll never purposely touch a snake. I'm going to just let that be a fear forever and be ok with it.

Anonymous said...

Cali, your blog is pure entertainment. I can't believe you caught that snake. Whatever made you do such a thing? And you're right, those time capsules for a young teenager probably aren't a good idea. Then again, it does teach us how superficial we get as teenagers and how we "can't see past Friday night"....I have an owl in my trees, too, and I'm going to be watching him for any shower activity. Lynn

toddash said...

yes, your blog pleases me. i also had a time capsule. it was in the same can. haahaa. it did have a tape of me singing, which was a treasure. i can still remember my mom trying to get me to put a my little pony in it (i was in first grade). but i wouldn't do it. the only toy i put in there was a miniture stuffed panda that held a sucker stick. i already ate the sucker. ha.

so and i hate snakes. well, mostly. i was thinking you were very brave.

Laurie Bingham said...

I love it. Did you know Sara has a pet snake named Trailer. Maybe you could be friends. Guess what. I had a talent show with my activity day girls today and I played Edelwiess on the guitar. I thought of you.

Anonymous said...

Dear Cali,
I faithfully check your blog everyday, hoping and hoping you have written. I've cut you some slack lately because I know you've been busy but TIMES UP! Make something up if you have to, it would not disappoint. We all miss you.
Love, Aunt Rachel